This topic of real world objects vs iPhone apps tends to come up a lot in discussions about app pricing. In an environment where so much can be had for 99 cents, or even free, users get accustomed to it and become outraged when something is over a few bucks. $4.99? “Highway robbery!” $9.99? “Are they serious!” $24.99? There’s many things I could write here but with the way the internet is it kind of devolves fast, I’ll just say I’m trying to keep this place relatively clean of that stuff.

Anyways if you don’t believe me, I’ll present some examples from commenters on Touch Arcade (one of the central cesspools of the internet for these types of people1) on Espgaluda II.

First a little background on the developer, Cave, and their games to give a frame of reference. It’s rare enough that their games get 1) console releases at all, and 2) get released outside of Japan. 1 has changed a bit in recent years with the 360 activity, but before that their last console release was sometime in the 90s on Saturn and the original Playstation. The only other way to play their games has been emulation, and that only has games on their first generation hardware, which is two or three generations ago now.

And one other thing that never happens, a cheap release. New boards are in the $2,000-3,000 range (possibly more these days for all I know!), while used boards may be able to be had for the low low price…of a few hundred dollars.2 The 360 releases aren’t expensive, but at $70 or so they still demand a premium.

So on to the iPhone release of Espgaluda II, from early tests it appears to be a full arcade port (plus a special iPhone mode), worldwide release, and on sale at release at $4.99, with the normal price being $8.99. Now with all that out of the way, welcome to the world of Touch Arcade:

$0.99 or nothing baby! This game is going to be IMPOSSIBLE to play without controller support… sorry.

at $9 for the game, i don’t think they really care too much about how much of the market they’re missing out on anyway :D

4.99…is the SALE price?? ARGH, theyre KILLING me here… but since its EspGaluda, i, the poor person, will buy it.. :eek:

How many levels are in the game?
What’s so unique about it? I love schmups and this one looks very nice from the videos, but at $5 sale or $8 normal price it must be really special. Do they charge the higher price because of the successful console version, or is it technically and graphically more advanced somehow?

(And that’s just the posts about the price, there’s some more gold about wondering why it won’t work on older devices because “background and sprites all look 2d,” and heathens that don’t know the difference between Cave games and some ghetto one probably written by a European who has no experience with the genre.)

With that out of the way we can get back to the topic at hand, real life objects vs apps. People bring up stuff like “you don’t bat an eye at a $4 latte or $20 for movies!” I’ve been known to impulse buy games under $20 (hopefully Deadly Premonition soon), we’re just conditioned to the higher prices in life so those prices don’t seem like a big deal. Meanwhile on the App Store we’ve been conditioned to be cheapskates.

(Just ignore the fact that we paid $100-300 for the phone (subsidized!) and are paying at least $70/month. More reason to save on what we can!)

Here’s where burgers come in. The fast food industry has taken advantage of the whole “world economy failing” thing and embraced the power of the almighty DOLLAR. As in a single dollar, not the value of our currency as a whole relative to the world market. Now you can directly compare burgers (and other dollar menu items) to whatever fart apps you might pick up for a buck on the app store. Lets see how they stack up in fancy iWork/Numbers form:

i know this is ridiculous

Technically this is calories vs number of apps

Sure the nutritional value is questionable at best, but hey calories are calories, and if you need physical life sustinence, a burger will be a better choice. Apps don’t even register on the chart! Even five apps vs one burger, it’s no contest! On the other hand if you wanted to lose weight you should just buy the apps instead. For every 3,500 calories you avoid, that’s another pound not gained!

Of course if you wanted to go all Homer, buy all those burgers, especially from Burger King!3 King of Fat!

I used to look like this, until I bought the iPhone

So what I guess I’m saying is buy Espgaluda II when it comes out, you cheapasses.

Pick up Lose It while you’re at it, it’ll help you lose even more weight.

  1. Well the readers are, the writers aren’t as horrible I guess. God knows I’ve wanted to strangle them sometimes still.
  2. It’d be in the lower range if it weren’t for the stupid rich zealot Neo-Geo collectors needing something else to waste money on. These people didn’t even know about Cave while they were spending thousands of dollars on their NG carts, then when they ran out of NG stuff to collect, BOOM! All of a sudden my $300 Ketsui board is worth $10004 because of these morons and now there’s no way in hell I can afford anything new because they’re keeping the prices super high.
  3. I think I got the BK numbers wrong, but still, they tend to be the worst calorie wise either way.
  4. Well normally that would be good, but I ain’t selling. It’s one of the greatest games ever! Brandon Sheffield is a hack.5
  5. …but his idiotic “review” of Ketsui probably helped keep demand and the price low for so long. Go pan all of Cave’s games so I can afford them again!